some people have people

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Sometimes, when I scroll through old pictures or stumble upon familiar faces, I catch myself staring at how tightly some people have stayed connected. You know, the kind of friendships that survive years, jobs, cities, maybe even silence. They still have that group inside jokes, birthday posts, random hangouts that turn into memories.

And I don’t.

I was never really a part of those circles. Maybe around them, but never in them. I used to think it didn’t matter, that I was fine being on my own, but lately it hits differently. Watching people who’ve known each other forever still finding reasons to laugh together. it makes me feel like I missed something small but important along the way.

It’s not jealousy, not even longing for them in particular. It’s just… wondering why I never had that. Why I don’t have anyone to message just because I remembered a random old memory. Why every phase of my life feels like I outgrew people faster than I could hold on to them.

And maybe it’s hitting harder because my birthday’s coming up. It’s always that time of the year when everything feels heavier than it should. Like the universe quietly reminding me of all the people who used to be there, and the ones who never really were.

I don’t hate it, but I don’t like it either. It’s just one of those quiet realisations that sit with you longer than you want them to.


almost, but not in
nandi❤

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